This Will Get the Dog to Play With You

Of course everyone here in Lexington is happy at yesterday’s announcement about the University of Kentucky hiring a new football coach.  The previous coach, Joker Phillips, was a nice guy, but he only won one game out of three, and this year’s football season was so bad that it came as no surprise when UK let him go.  Nor was it a good sign when the smaller colleges that beat UK, like Western Kentucky University, made T-shirts commemorating the game; we only do that when the UK Wildcats win a bowl game or the championship!

The new coach, Mark Stoops, is a defensive coordinator at Florida State, and just the reputation of that team is raising hopes here.  I am also pleased because of my brother’s involvement with FSU; I wrote about that in my messages from August 9, 2009; September 20, 2010; and November 5, 2011.

The strangest news of the day has to be the announcement of a bacon-scented shaving cream.  Only 2,500 jars of the stuff have been made, and are on sale here for $14.99.  Shave with it, and you’ll smell like bacon for hours.  Here’s what the website says about it.  Quote:

J&D’s Bacon Shaving Cream is a high end, luxurious bacon-scented shaving cream for all skin types. It is best used after a hot shower or before an important date with someone you may want to spend the rest of your life with.

Unquote:  Sure, we like the scent of bacon, and in redneck country I’m sure it will sell.  But is that something that will really attract your date?  It’s more likely to get the attention of a dog or cat; that’s why I said it will make the dog play with you.

bacon_roses

Speaking of products that attract pets, is there something that will make my parrot like me?  Brin-Brin always liked Leive better, so if I am on the main floor of the house and she isn’t, Brin-Brin will growl most of the time, and snap when I come near the cage.  He only seems to tolerate my presence when he is hungry.

But a new coach and bacon shaving cream aren’t the biggest story of the day.  That would have to be the Powerball lottery, which has a lot of folks going crazy, now that the jackpot is at an unprecedented $550 million.  The drawing will be held in a few minutes, so by the time you read this, we will probably know if there is a winner.

I did have to stand in line behind some folks buying lottery tickets at the gas station today, but I didn’t buy one.  I have never bought a lottery ticket in my life, and even now I don’t plan to start.  To me it always seemed like a tax on the dumb, or at least on those who have trouble with math.  For every winner there must be thousands or in this case, millions of losers; the odds of winning this one are 1 in 175 million.  You are more likely to get hit by lightning than you are to win the lottery; or as we used to say in Florida, you’re more likely to get hit by a falling tile from the Space Shuttle.  See you tomorrow!

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